The Silent Parrot

A person enters a pet shop and sees a beautiful parrot. The seller guarantees him that the bird repeats everything it hears, so the person buys it. However, when he goes back home and tests the bird, it turns out that it doesn’t say a word. The buyer goes to the shop to complain to the seller, but the seller argues he has not lied. How is this possible?

The parrot is deaf.

Nervous Breakdown

Once there was a recluse who always stayed in his home. The only time anyone visited him was when his food and supplies were delivered, but nobody came inside. One winter night there was a big storm and the recluse had a nervous breakdown. He went to his room, turned off all the lights and got in his bed. The next morning he found out that he caused the deaths of several hundred people. How?

The recluse was living in a lighthouse. When he turned off the lights, he caused several ships to get wrecked in the cliffs and many people die.

Deez Nuts

While changing a tire, a motorist accidentally dropped all four wheel nuts into the sewer grate. Just when the man lost all hope to retrieve the nuts and continue on his way, a kid passed by. After hearing the story, the kid gave an advice, which enabled the driver to successfully fit a new tire and drive to the nearest service station without any more accidents. What was the advice the kid gave to the motorist?

The kid suggested that the man uses one bolt from each of the other three wheels to fix the fourth one.

Deadly Vodka

Two politicians go to a bar and order two glasses of vodka on the rocks. The first politician quickly empties his glass, then orders a second one, a third one… The second politician patiently drinks his own vodka, but about 20 minutes later, he drops down dead. The police discovered that the barman tried to assassinate both politicians, but how come the second one died and the first one lived?

The poison was in the ice cubes, so the second politician drank them when they melted in his drink.